


It's a Long Way Back (To the Place Where We Started From)

by gunslingaaahhh



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: 5.07, Coda, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-12
Updated: 2014-11-12
Packaged: 2018-02-25 01:49:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2604161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gunslingaaahhh/pseuds/gunslingaaahhh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny and Steve, healing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's a Long Way Back (To the Place Where We Started From)

**Author's Note:**

> So I haven't written/posted ANYTHING in over a year... be gentle, please! 
> 
> 5.07 murdered my soul and like many others, I had to do something - no hug for Steve?! C'mon Danny you're better than that!
> 
> Thanks to my cheerleaders for the encouragement; they know who they are <3

At first everything was numb, like when your foot falls asleep. Steve knew he was walking – though it felt more like floating – out of that terrible room with Chin under one arm and Danny under the other. He could sense rather than see Kono behind them, watching their six, and could hear Grover barking orders ahead of them. His whole team surrounding him, doing one thing or another, like a well oiled machine.

When they got outside, however, it was like all his nerve endings came back online at once and everything was pain. He made a noise, and it must’ve been louder than he intended because Danny’s head swung around, eyes wide with concern.

“Babe?”

Steve just grit his teeth in response, jaw clenching. Danny had seen Steve in pain enough times to be able to gauge how bad it was, and suddenly he _was_  floating, both Chin and Danny lifting him by the legs and carrying him to the ambulance. An EMT was there to greet them, one Steve recognized, though he couldn’t remember the man’s name.

“We gotta get him to the hospital, right now,” Danny was saying as he and Chin deposited Steve onto the waiting stretcher. Everything hurt, and where the soft, clean place to lie down should’ve been a comfort, it only grated at Steve’s abused skin.

The EMT nodded and signaled to his partner, who hopped out and assisted in loading the stretcher into the ambulance. Blue sky turned into white ceiling as Steve was rolled in; panic bloomed in his chest; bad things happened to him in white rooms.

“Danny!” he called, sitting bolt upright. Nothing bad could happen if Danny stayed with him.

“Here, babe, right here,” Danny assured him, pulling himself into the ambulance. The doors closed behind him and the vehicle began to roll towards the hospital.

“Danny, the room, the white room, things happened and I—“ Steve began, eyes wide, gaze going from one EMT to the other.

“Hey, it’s ok, these guys just want to check you out,” Danny said, his voice low and soothing.

The EMT closest was preparing an IV line, and while part of Steve’s brain understood the necessity, the rest of him flew into a panic upon sight of the needle. The second EMT was grasping at his feet, trying to hold him down, while the other worked with Danny to get Steve on his back again. Thrashing, Steve narrowly avoided punching the nearest EMT in the nose before rolling closer to Danny and grasping at both his hands, breathing harshly.

“Whoa, ok, let’s stop for a second,” Danny announced to the group at large, before leaning in closer to Steve’s face. “Hey, what’s wrong? You’re severely dehydrated, babe, you need fluids.”

Steve shook his head violently, eyes darting back to the EMT with the IV line. Danny didn’t understand, he hadn’t been there—

“Steve—“

“Danny, the needles! Please don’t let them stick me again, not again, no more needles, please Danno,” he begged, already able to feel the phantom sting of a syringe punching through his skin.

Studying his face for a moment and taking a closer look at the marks he’d only glanced at on the back of Steve’s neck, Danny’s brow furrowed.

“Steven, I need you to listen to me, ok? I know those guys jabbed you with needles, they injected you with something, I can tell from your eyes. But these guys? Are good guys. All that’s in that bag is fluids your body needs.”

“Hey, Commander? If I put a line in you now, then the nurses won’t have to do it when you get to the ER. They can pretty much hook everything up to this one line, only one stick,” the EMT offered. “And the needle is small, see?”

Steve studied the needle warily, eying the tubing that lead to the clear bag of fluid. Clear had to be good; all the crap that woman had given him was brown or amber colored.

“See Steve? Not so bad… why don’t you watch him put it in, too, so you know what’s going on,” Danny suggested, nodding to the EMT.

Slowly reclining to lay on his back again, Steve kept one of Danny’s hands clasped in his own as he watched the EMT insert the IV. Once he was satisfied it was in place, he started the drip and grudgingly, Steve admitted he was starting to feel a little better.

He still didn’t like the needle, though. He could still feel each individual stick as the woman stabbed him with the syringe over and over.

Suddenly, Steve was aware that he was feeling more tired, more sleepy than he had been. Did the EMT drug him after all? Was this just another hallucination? Panic bloomed again and Steve began to thrash, wanting desperately to pull the IV out. He heard Danny shout something, felt the EMTs work together to strap him to the stretcher. He felt the straps tighten their hold before he passed out.

~*~

Everything is floaty, like being stuck inside a cotton ball, and Steve feels himself frown. The drugs the woman had given him didn’t make him float, but they did make his head feel funny. Peeling open an eye and half expecting to be back inside the white room, or even strapped to the chair, Steve is shocked to find himself in a hospital bed, clean dry clothes on his body, bandages and ointment on his wounds. He makes to lift a hand and finds that he can’t; he’s strapped to the bed. Despair floods through him as he struggles, a machine nearby beeping angrily. Hurried footsteps approach, and Steve readies himself for the worst.

What he gets is a very rumpled Danny.

“Steve? You’re awake! Thank god, you scared the shit out of me, you fucker!”

“I can’t move.”

Danny freezes for a moment before his shoulders slump and he trudges towards Steve’s bed, dropping into a conveniently placed chair. “Yeah, about that… so when we got here, they took some blood to do a tox screen, to see what Wo Fat and his henchwoman loaded you up with.”

“And?”

“The doctor still isn’t sure. Seems like a whole cocktail of stuff. Anyway, I guess they were pumping it into you pretty regularly, because _not_  having it threw you into withdrawls. You were shivering so hard we thought you were having a seizure, so they had to… restrain you.”

“Well, I’m not shaking anymore, can we take them off?” Steve asked, going for casual but missing by a mile. The pulse oximeter on his finger was flashing steadily, betraying his façade of cool.

“I signaled to the nurse, she should be here any second. And if you even  _think_  of asking her when you’re getting out, I will smack you so hard, you’re grandchildren will feel it.” The expression on Danny’s face brooked no arguments, so Steve bit his tongue.

A nurse eventually appeared, checked Steve’s vitals, and agreed to remove the restraints. She told them the doctor would be making his rounds soon, and took her leave. Danny remained quiet through the whole process, arms folded tightly across his chest. Steve watched him from beneath his lashes, waiting until they were alone again.

“Hey, Danno… are you ok?”

Danny huffed. “Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

“Probably. But, all things considered…”

Leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees, Danny propped his head in his hands. “All things considered, I just lost my brother in a horrific manner, and I was fairly certain – until you moved, of course – that I had also lost you in a similarly horrific manner. How do you think I am? Would you say I’m doing ok?”

Steve narrowed his eyes and let his gaze roam over his partner. He couldn’t remember what Danny had been wearing when they came in, but as he had a long-sleeve t-shirt and jeans on, he must’ve changed. That was all he’d done, if the near-beard and unruly hair were anything to go by. The dark purple smudges under his eyes told the same story.

“I’d say that no, you aren’t, but you’re trying.”

A wry grin, “trying is the operative word there, my friend. I will say I’m still doing better than you. I don’t know anyone else that can say they’ve been tortured with a cattle prod, twice.”

Steve closed his eyes at the pain-memory, and the knowledge that he had blisters all over his chest and stomach again. A warm, calloused hand slid over his and gripped his fingers. “Babe?”

“Yeah.”

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to make you think about it. I know it’s hard not to think about, but—“

“It’s ok, Danno.”

They sat in companionable silence until the doctor showed up, only slightly raising his eyebrows at their clasped hands. “Well Commander, I have to tell you I’m amazed how well you’re holding up, given the circumstances. I will tell you that we’re still trying to determine the chemicals in your system, and that considering the dosages, you’ll be feeling some of the effects for a while.”

Both men replied to the doctor at the same time, Danny’s “what kind of effects?” overlayed with Steve’s “how long is a while?”

The doctor held up his hands, waiting for quiet before continuing. “Your team mentioned that you might have been experiencing some… hallucinations? Visions, waking dreams? They may continue until the drugs work their way out of your system. As for how long that takes, I can’t say because I unfortunately do not know what the drugs are. I’d suggest a few weeks leave to recover for your physical injuries, and hopefully that helps with the mental ones.”

“Thank you, doctor,” Danny said, sighing.

“How much longer do I need to stay here?” Steve asked before the man could leave.

The doctor frowned. “That depends. Here we can monitor you and counteract the hallucinations if they return. There’s no way to know if you pose a danger to yourself.”

“What about out-patient?” Danny offered, eyebrows raised. “I mean, you know who this guy is, right? He’ll be looking to bust out of here at the first opportunity. You can’t keep him strapped to a bed forever.”

“No, we can’t. If he’s going to recover elsewhere I’d have to be sure someone was with him, to assist with proper care of injuries—“

Danny held up a hand. “Doc, that’s been my job for a few years now, I’m more than qualified. Between me and the rest of the team, we got this guy covered. At least we’ll have more luck keeping him in his house than you would here.”

The doctor sighed, resigned; he knew about Five-0 and their exploits, as well as Steve’s inability to follow doctor’s orders. After vowing to put the requisite paperwork through to start discharge, he took his leave, shaking his head.

“Thanks Danny. I don’t think I could stand staying here, with all the—“ Steve cut himself off. He didn’t want to talk about needles and sharps anymore.

“I know, babe, I’ve got you. I’m gonna step out and call the troops, let them know what the next move is.”

Steve’s grip tightened reflexively around Danny’s fingers, and the beeping sped up. Danny’s eyes softened before leaning in close, almost forehead-forehead.

“Hey, listen to me, ok? I’m with you, I’m not leaving you. You’ll be able to see me right out there in the hall, alright? I have to call Chin and let him know whats going on; a text earlier wasn’t enough. Once we get out of here, I’ll be with you the whole time, whatever you need, ok?”

Nodding, Steve slowly released the other man’s hand, and watched him step out into the hallway, phone to his ear. He couldn’t hear the conversation, but the familiar cadence of Danny’s voice was comforting, and Steve found himself drifting off. He wasn’t feeling any pain at the moment, but he knew once they took him off the pain-management meds, he’d be in a world of hurt. Best get some sleep while he could.

~*~

He leaves the hospital in a daze, Danny scurrying around making sure everything is in order before loading Steve into the car and carefully driving them home. They’d had a brief argument over which home to go to; upon hearing Steve’s confusion regarding his father, Danny was wary to go back to the house; Steve didn’t want to impose on Grace. The Grace-card always won.

It was near to dinner time when they arrived, and Steve could feel the stiffness of his muscles setting in. Danny hurried around to his side of the car to help him out, but Steve waved him off; he needed to at least make it to the door on his own steam. Once inside however, Danny practically propped him up as they staggered through the hall and up the stairs. It felt like he’d climbed a mountain, and Danny dutifully paused at the top of the stairs so Steve could catch his breath.

Once in Steve’s bedroom, Danny unceremoniously dropped him onto the mattress, hurrying out of the room and back out to the car. Steve froze where he was, anxiety thick in his throat until he heard Danny reenter the house and lock up before returning.

“Just wanted to make sure I had all the care instructions,” he said, waving a paper back and forth. “That and the burn cream, we’ll need to reapply before you settle in. Do you want to shower?”

Steve shook his head; he wanted to sleep, sleep dreamlessly, with Danny there to protect him. Sighing, Danny tugged at the borrowed t-shirt until Steve was bare-chested, hissing through his teeth at the large blisters. He gently applied the cream while Steve remained stoically silent, smoothing it into the tender skin. He helped Steve get his legs up onto the bed and he rolled onto his side, shivering. Danny hissed again at the marks on Steve’s neck, gentle fingers there and gone.

“You want to sleep in your sweats?”

Groaning, Steve rolled onto his back and shimmied out of the sweatpants, sighing with relief when he was just in his underwear. Even the soft material was too much. Danny huffed a laugh before climbing on the bed beside Steve, a book in hand. Steve tried not to think about Danny leaving once he was asleep, stayed awake as long as he could until he felt Danny pull the sheet up to cover him. “Sleep,” the blond whispered. “I’m right here, go to sleep.”

Steve did.

But not for long; all at once he was back on the beach with his father, beer in hand, smile on his face as they watched the sunset. He wanted to sink into it, enjoy it, though his rational self was telling him it wasn’t real. He thrashed in his sleep, whimpering; why couldn’t it be real? If only for a few minutes? He missed his father, missed him terribly, hadn’t even realized how much until he had to relive the realization that he was gone.

“Steve? Steve!”

“No,” Steve moaned, wanting to burrow back into the unreality, stay there with his dad.

“Steve, wake up babe, c’mon,” Danny pleaded, the worry evident in his tone. Waking came, and Steve lashed out, pushing Danny away.

“It was dad, he was here, you took him away,” he said, childish.

“It was just a dream,” the other man said, sad. “You know he’s gone, we talked about this.”

“I don’t want him to be, he doesn’t have to be, you saved him, Danno,” Steve stuttered out, voice breaking on a sob. Danny was there to meet him halfway as Steve threw himself into the other man’s arms, clutching like a lifeline. “You were there, you saved him.”

“I wish I could have, Steve, I really do. I wish I could’ve been there, but it’s not real, it’s just a dream. This, right here? Is real. I’m real.”

Steve sobbed against Danny’s chest, tightening his hold. Even though the Danny in the unreality wasn’t really his, at least he’d been there. This Danny was still better, even with not being able to save his dad.

“You shouldn’t have to do this,” Steve mumbled, wiping at his eyes. “With Matt—“

“I want to. If I didn’t want to be here I wouldn’t be, ok? I’ve done my crying for my brother; will there be more? Maybe. But right now the only person I’m crying for is you, and what they did to you.”

Danny’s arms tightened around Steve’s shoulders almost painfully, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

“I love you,” Danny whispered, voice tentative, almost halting.

“I love you, too,” Steve replied, just as quiet, though with more assurance. He’d always loved Danny, had loved him from the first.

“I’m here, I’m real, I love you, and I’m not leaving you,” he said again, voice stronger this time. “Ok Steve?”

“Ok Danno. Ok.”

 

-FIN-


End file.
